So...... It  has been a long time since I updated! I'm now  a Mrs., which is weird but exciting at the same time. We have been married  for about  6 months..

 I am  starting  a new blog , I will post a link soon.

-Jess

I Suck

...as a blogger that is. I have come to realize that blogging is not for everyone, but I want to try to get better.

Everything is going well, Mr. C will be home soon I'm so excited! We are going to get away when he comes back, which will be amazing.  I need a vacation like people in hell need ice water!

Anyways in case you guys were wondering Mr. C and I are in a great place. As in he has been looking at rings (on his own) and has even stopped buying all of his expensive electronics. So I know he means business! Ha.

That is all for now, I've been lurking on everyone's blogs and you ladies are definitely inspirations in many ways. Maybe I can get motivated to post more.

Here are some pictures from our last vacay courtesy of Mr. C, we went down to the beach to watch the sun rise.

A post a day...

I think that I am going to challenge myself to write one post a day for the entire week to get in to the habit of posting more frequently. This post will count as Monday's.


So to finish where we left off;


I knew everything was going to be ok. I had been so anxious, confused, lost and upset, but none if it mattered. I could have lost him. The irony is that I was having a conversation with a friend on whether or not I might have to leave and in that same time frame he was in major bus/car accident. 


I remember feeling really bad at first. Here I was thinking of leaving and I was the first person on his mind. It took me a while to get over feeling guilty about that. 


A couple of weeks passed and he still didn't give me an answer about the direction we were headed in. I was ok with it though, not nearly as upset as I had been weeks earlier. I already knew that everything was going to be ok. 


Then one night he told me what I'd been waiting to here. That he knew that he wanted me to be his wife and to have a future together. Apparently the accident really opened his eyes.


Through this all I've learned a lot about myself I have way more patience and strength then I though. I've grown as a person, we've grown as a couple and know we are an inseparable team ready to face whatever life throws our way. Together. 

I'm back, for real this time! Ha

It's been quit a while and a lot has gone on in the last 6 months or so.

 Mr. C and I hit a rough patch...a really rough patch in which he just wasn't as sure about our future as he once was. To say that I was hurt would be an understatement. We were in a limbo for a couple of months, trying to move on as though things were normal but both in a sad place. For him it was hard to know that he was hurting me by having uncertainty and for me it was hard just not knowing.

So I did what I could to focus on what I had control over, my health and career. I told myself and him that I had in fact set a deadline in which I would walk away if we did not come to some understanding. See Mr. C was set to deploy again and I refused to enter another deployment with so much uncertainty. To me two years was more than enough time to know if we were going to the next level or not. To his credit Mr. C is the most kind and loving boyfriend a girl could ask for and he would do anything for me. Mr. C has also had somethings on his plate which contributed to that uncertainty that aren't for me to share.

And then in December everything changed. Mr. C's Car go hit by a bus, you know one of those big commuter buses. I was so scared when I first got his call, but then he told me the only person he wanted to talk to and see after the accident was me.  And for the first time in months I did not feel as anxious about our future anymore.

TO BE CONTINUED....

Hey Ya'll

Yes I'm still alive and well... I was just reviewing my blog and I realized that I want to change the tone of it. So right now I'm working on what I want my blog to be about =)


Side notes;

• The last Harry Potter was awesome, even though some weirdo sat next to me.  Seriously he was a strange one.
• C and I are fine. We had a big talk and are definitely on the same page.
• Work is going well.
• Still navigating my way through grad school options. 

I HOPE EVERYONE IS DOING WELL!

Gotta Love a Great Pair of Flip Flops.

I hope all the mothers out there had a great day!

I spent the day getting a mani and pedi with my mom and enjoying dinner together. For her mother's day gift I got us her some Fit Flops, we wear the same size ;-)

Below is a picture of my huge feet modeling them:

They are super comfortable and are toning as well. They are a little pricey coming in at $59.99, but so worth it.

There was a really funny moment. C sent me a text saying "Happy Mothers Day Babe". Inside I immediate begin saying oh hell no. But I responded "Thanks. But that wont apply to me for many years to come, Ha". Gotta love him.

I Have a Date!!!

....With my kindle. Ha Ha. C is in Georgia with his family and I'm at home with mine. In fact I've been living at home since the end of last September.

For six whole months I've been living with good old pain in the *** Mom and Dad. JK .While I'm grateful to be living rent free... moving back home after being out on your own sucks. Like sucks big time! My Mom and I are too much alike.

I miss my own space....

And I might be slightly jealous of C moving to his new place, since I decided not to move in together again just yet. But hey it will all work out, at least I can get away on the weekends.

Have any of you ladies ever had to stay at home again? Please tell me I'm not alone.

C's Home...Continued.

Continued....


So I arrived at the hotel checked and then everything hit me at once. C was back, like really back in the states and I was going to be seeing him in a few moments. I started to get nervous....


So the hour wait comes and goes and C is still not here. I'm getting more anxious and annoyed at the same time. I call C and he says he's downstairs. Awesome! So I wait some more and another thirty minutes go by. I call C again, he tells me he's on his way and that he went to the wrong hotel!!! Really??? Who does that evidently C who went to the Marriott and not the J.W. Marriott. 


At this point my nervousness has reached an all time high. I couldn't sit still, I couldn't focus on TV, I kept checking the peep hole and of course he still hadn't arrived. Then finally I hear the door start to open and there he is in person. 


I think we just stood there with our arms locked around each other for a good five minutes. He was home again and it felt like he never left. All was right again. 

I'm back!!!!!!

Hello. Sorry I was so lazy busy and have not been a good blogger. The past month or so has been kind of hectic. 


Mr. C came home!!! Woo Hoo!!!! I was totally looking forward to picking him up and spending quality time together. But of course that did not happen, because I had to work and while in transition we aren't supposed to miss any days. Booo!!!! But we did get the chance to see each other a few days later so here goes that story....


I didn't get off work until 6pm that Saturday. And I immediately ran walked briskly to my car. I had already packed and filled my gas tank, which almost drove me to tears, so I was able to hit the road immediately. I hopped on I-20 and my lead foot took over. You see Mr. C is temporarily stay in GA until he starts at his new base this month.  So...He rented a 4 star hotel for us in downtown Atlanta to enjoy for the weekend.  


Back to the story... My lead foot had me arriving earlier than I expected. So I called C to tell him and of course he did not answer...the first time or the second time or the third time. On the 4th call he answers says that he's in the store and could he call me back, not giving me enough time to say "Babe I'm 20 minutes away".  So at this point I'm reminding myself that I love him and that he just got back and anything else to keep me from getting annoyed. So Mr. C calls back and I tell him that I am 20 minutes away. What does he tell me???? That he hasn't left his parents yet and that he would be an hour or so. WTF... I remained calm said ok and I love you. Of course I cursed as soon as I got off the phone. In fact I didn't even see when he called me back.  I was surprised to see a voice mail, C's message told me that he had sent me a copy of the reservations and called to make sure that I'd be let in. That saved C's a** cause the last thing I wanted to do was sit in a car for an hour.  To be continued because it my bedtime =)

Im still alive

I know I went MIA.... But I had a good excuse. The babe is back! Yay and already driving me crazy, mostly in a good way. I will post a longer one in the next couple of days about homecoming and stuff. I MISS YOUR BLOGS, I have lots of catching up to do

Let the Countdown Begin

This month has been a great one.  The classroom of training at my job is almost over and I finally get to practice all that I have learned. Yipee.  I really, really, did I say really like my job and Mr. C does too.  Plus I will finally really be able to more into the blog. I'm looking for someone to design a new one for me. Any suggestions?

I've signed up for some new classes that start next month. Oh and my company pays for all of it! I'm looking forward to continuing my education.

I got my hair braided...Can you say ten hours? I have a big head and very thick hair. I also got some new glasses! Tiffany and Co. are the best, I love the light blue on the inside.

But best of all I am finally starting my countdown for Mr. C to come home. I'm so excited and I just can't hide it.

Insane in the membrane?

Hi Ladies! I hope all is well. Sorry I have not been the greatest blogger lately. So let me share whats been going on.

Training has been going well. I like my new job so far and it is such a relief not having to drive 200 miles a day. Plus it looks like hes going to be stationed 37 miles away from my new job =) Great news right?  But I'm debating whether or not I want to move in together.

You see Mr. C didn't want to move in right away =( At first my feeling were a little hurt, but I was ok with it.  We have never really lived apart throughout our entire relationship and he wanted to see what it would be like. Plus part of me thinks that Mr. C was at a fork in the road in regards to our relationship.  Meaning that I think he was trying to figure out if this was going to lead to the M word.

I've been engaged before, so I'm in no rush and in fact I'm all for taking things slow. Mr. C has had some friends that have had some bad experiences. When he found out that he was deploying, everyone asked him how did Jess take the news?  It almost made me feel as though they thought I couldn't handle the "military lifestyle".

But I could and I did. I made sure the apartment was taken care of after he had to leave. I took care of all the loose ends and finished moving myself back to my parents. And I did all of this while still working full time, because my last crappy job wouldn't give me days off.

I've sent numerous care packages, the biggest one was 28 pounds ;) And I continued to send them after I left my job, in fact I worked extra part time hours at my old dept store job so I could pay for them. He was able to share with some of his friends there and in fact all of them called him spoiled. Shipping is definitely a nightmare. Side note: He does spoil me as well, very much so.

But I did it all because I love him and I plan on always being there to support him in any way I know how.  So now he has been talking about moving in together sooner... And you know what I'm in no rush. I had already planned on just staying over on weekends anyway. I know he wants a long term future with me, but I just wish he would discuss it more. And part of me feels like if he didn't see this side of me over the course of deployment he would not have wanted to move in together as quickly. So my question is what would you do? Would you move in?  

One more thing:  My title was Insane in the Membrane because I'm doing Shaun T's INSANITY! I'm on my second week. I gotta look good in my bikini while I'm sipping margaritas! HA

Good Weekend Anyone?

A little Birthday update. My poor phone was dead all that day so I had no access to chat or email. When I got home I checked my email and I got the sweetest thing ever: 

 He is so freaking cute!

Plus I got part of my birthday gift courtesy of Amazon. The pictures were the best gift ever, I didn't even need anything else. C knew I was having a bad day and just wanted to make me smile.

On another note my job is going well.  I'm trying to make new friends, but we shall see. The most important thing is that I think I'm going to like my job =) I have to get a blogging app for my Droid so I can blog during my lunch.

So ladies what is the sweetest thing your Babe has ever done for you?

So its my Birthday

And I will be honest it is a little depressing.

My mom, who I love with all my heart, pissed me the freak off. I mean to the point where I got back home from training around 12pm ish, I got back in my car and drove around until 1:30 ish.

Now I'm kind of feeling a little bad about my morning outburst. It is not my usual behavior, I mean I did not even want them to sing Happy Birthday.

Does anyone else feel guilty when they feel upset with other people even when they have a right to? Cause I'm starting to feel hella guilty.

It has been a rough couple of weeks, but you can only blog but so much about negative stuff you know?

So positives:
It is my birthday.
I think I like my new job.
I have not cut my hair off.
My new job has a gym that only cost 15 bucks a month on site!
Its closer to Mr. C getting back home.

Yuck

That is just how I feel right now.  I have not forgotten about posting I've just been a little down.  I will be back soon.
~Jess~

The day I almost cut my hair off...

So I've been attempting to go natural and today I was annoyed with my hair.  So I annoyed I almost cut it, but I didn't and I probably won't.  I've never had really short hair before, I'm so glad I didn't cut it and I think Mr. C is too.

On another note I have to start studying for the GRE soon and I start my new full time job Thursday. I'm so excited!

I will finish the Mr. C story tomorrow! Exciting stuff right?? ha

An Off Day....

Yesterday was kind of an off day for me.  I've noticed that my mood is closely linked to C and the same goes for him.  So every now and again I get.... well annoyed.

Don't get me wrong C is a great guy.  He's loving, attentive, generous and he is my best friend. I know he goes out of his way to talk to me with the little free time that he has. But sometimes I don't know if he realizes that I do the same.  That I always keep my phone nearby and on instant messenger.  That I try to stay near the house so that we can video chat. So I wonder how he is going to handle it when I start working full time again during the hours we usually chat.

So yesterday we were supposed to be "video chatting", but it felt as though I was doing most of the chatting and he was giving me occasional responses. Might I add that he was web surfing at the same time... So shortly after I told he I could talk to him later and he said "you sound disappointed". Of course I said no I'm not, even though I was.  He said "we've talked a long time", it was maybe 20 minutes or so. We said our love yous and ended our chat.

Why was I disappointed?  Because our last couple of combined instant messaging conversations before that were for maybe a total of 15 minutes with pauses included.  Because I hate feeling as though I'm leading a conversation.  It makes me not even want to talk in the first place. Of course I'm not going to ignore him, but maybe I just should not be as quick jump.

A few months ago C told me "babe we have to let things happen naturally", meaning that we shouldn't plan out when we could talk. At the time I was store manager during 4th quarter working 70 hour weeks. I tried to explain to him that I did not have a lot of time and that I really had to put forth effort so that we could talk, but he did not seem to get it. So... for the next week I let it happen "naturally" and we did not talk for five days.  And he finally realized that maybe there should be more thought there.

I've learned to write emails that I never send to help me vent. Venting is an awesome tool! It helps me feel better and to get my thoughts together. It also provides me with the opportunity to censor myself.  After I vent, if there is something still bothering me and I realize that its not me being delusional I bring it up in the form of an e-mail. It has worked wonders for us.

So I guess for the next few days I will let things happen naturally, if we talk we talk and if we don't we don't. So why am I clicking over to instant messaging to see if he is "available".

"That Couple"

You see Mr. C and I are that couple, you know the one that sits together on the same side of the booth. I know it is a little weird, but it is also kind of nice too. And to think I use to sometimes snicker at couples I saw doing this!

But this is not the real topic of my post today. C and I are obviously a little different. From our pictures you can tell that I'm black, but you can't tell that C is white and one fourth Asian. He is often told that he looks to be of Spanish descent, but not necessarily in those words.

So... we are technically considered an interracial couple, even though I don't usually refer to us that way.  When I talk about C, he's just C to me.
The guy who holds my heart (couldn't resist a corny phrase in there). 

I labeled this post "that couple" because...

~We are that couple that tends to turn heads when we enter a room, but we are  

   modest about being so attractive he he ha ha. 

~We are that couple that is always given a welcome back when we visit certain

   places because they "remember us".

~We are that couple that tends to surprise people when they are introduced to 

   the other half of our said couple. And that goes across the board.

~We are that couple that had to say goodbye in an airport in NC so that he could  
   serve overseas.
~We are that couple that tells each other just how much we love each other  
   on a daily basis whether through email, IM, or my favorite... video chat.

But what some people don't realize are our similarities, because they only see the outward differences.

We are both:

~College graduates and want to get our masters.

~Have the same faith.

~Have the same values.

~Are Family oriented.

~Working on getting settled in our careers and finances.

~Working towards marriage and "Pandas" ha
~Committed to maintaining and strengthening our relationship.
~And a bunch of other stuff! ha


We have not faced problems in our relationship due to our differences.  Both of our families support us, as well as our friends. We live in the Carolinas and there has been nothing other than the occasional long stare. 


So what about you all? What have been some of your experiences as:


~A military couple?
~Interracial couple?
~Long distance couple?
~Or just your experiences as a couple in general....


~Jess~

=)

So I just finished video chatting with Mr. C. I am constantly amazed that it is possible to love someone so much and for them to love you equally as much.

I also mailed out 6 bottles of Buffalo Wild Wings Sauce, Mr. C's special request.  I made sure to stock up on mailing boxes and custom forms, so I should be good until he comes back.

Its amazing how by moving back to my tiny small town I seem to run into everyone I don't want to.  I'm so glad I took a few extra minutes to make sure my sweats matched and put a hat on my head. Win!

Jess

Dang...

So I know I said I would continue the story and I will very very soon... I pinky promise =)


     Thinking about our beginning makes me miss Mr. C even more than I already do.  And to think that he could have been home some time this month before his deployment got extended just downright sucks. But I have a great support system in my Mom.

     Mr. C is my best friend and I'm so happy to have him in my life.  The good thing about this deployment is the fact that our relationship is so much stronger.  You see this might sound a little scandalous, but C and I moved in together around three months after we met.  Shocking right??? And totally not like us, but hey it worked and I will talk about it in another post.

"Wow my hand looks huge here!! I'm not putting uncensored pictures up of Mr. C until after I tell him about the blog and get his permission". Jess

     So right now I'm just thinking about the future. All the things we want to do when he gets back its gonna be A.W.E.S.O.M.E.  Mr. C has already told me that he wants to spend the first couple of days alone. Wink...Wink... Yeah, I just can't wait for some good... FOOD.

       Ha, what did you think I was gonna say...but that too.  You see one of the things I miss the most are our date nights.  Mr. C is a fat kid, meaning that he eats a lot, but he works out a lot too in order to compensate for it.  Unfortunately he has turned me into a semi fat kid and I don't work out nearly as much as I used to and I need to, but that's for another post.  I miss our dinners a lot, whether it was at our favorite place we love, take out or my homemade meals (its true the way to a mans heart is his tummy).

I shall post again soon, Jess.